How to keep a moron in suspense
Honk if my country WHAT? Is stupid? Has a poor education system? Tell me please so I can honk! I must honk!!
Captain Trips, Dan Savage and the Pod People
Sorry I haven’t written lately, but I’m currently battling the deadly bronchitis again and haven’t felt much up to posting anything. Not even a video.
This scourge started as an allergy attack after all the dust and junk we kicked up last weekend when we started getting furniture and other assorted stuff ready to move into a POD, one of those giant storage device things that a truck drops off in your driveway and then picks up later once you fill it. It’s a big shed basically.
Well we live in a somewhat goofy neighborhood, and apparently one of our neighbors got a little goofy on goofy juice and decided that our storage bin was some sort of Salvation Army drop off point. And so one day last week we discovered a bag that had been placed in front of our POD that contained a rather odd assortment of items like a coffee mug, some giant stretch pants and an equally giant bra. Charming.
Speaking of pods, over the last month I’ve started getting into the world of podcasting. During the two months I spent moving out of my apartment I listened to my iPod incessantly, and got a little tired of the tunes. So I was looking for something else to listen to on my now doubled commute to work every day.
So far I’ve stuck fairly close to my wheelhouse. I’ve been listening to a good selection of video game podcasts, including the Joystiq podcast, EGM Live, 1up Yours, Retronauts and The Sports Anomaly. I may be dropping that last one though. While I like the guys who run it and have warmed to their rather insane banter, there’s just way too much real-world hockey and basketball talk for my taste.
Recently though on a recommendation I ventured out of my video game shell and subscribed to the Savage Love podcast, which as it turns out is a rather explicit sex-help call-in show. People call into a voice mail service with their crazy sex questions, and then sexologist Dan Savage calls them back and makes them feel somewhat silly as bluntly as possible. It’s fabulous. And okay, it’s not outside my wheelhouse at all.
One day, if I ever get more than two readers, I’m going to do my own podcast. I swear it.
Explain Something To Me
I’m posting a photo after the break that’s slightly NSFW, and I want you to tell me exactly what the hell these people were thinking. I want to know what the people in the photo were thinking, and I want to know what the hell the photographer was thinking.
Yeah Right: Women Say They Were Thrown Off Airplane Because They Were Pretty
Prejudice against pretty?
http://www.tampabays10.com/news/local/article.aspx?storyid=74549That’s the claim from a pair of 18-year-old best friends from Oldsmar who were escorted off a Southwest Airlines plane.
USF student Nisreen Swedberg and friend Sarah Williams claim the flight crew was rude to them from the moment they stepped onto the plane at Tampa International Airport on February 14.
Swedberg said she asked a flight attendant for a bottle of water and was told she could wait until the rest of the flight was served.“And I patiently waited and then when they came around with water, they skipped me,” Swedberg said.
At one point, Williams had to use the plane’s bathroom. She saw another passenger in it, and when he hadn’t come out 15 minutes later, she knocked on the door.
When he came out, Williams says the man came over to her seat and yelled a profanity at her. Williams admits she yelled a profanity back at him but was puzzled when she says the flight crew only questioned her.
“I think they were just discriminating against because we were young decent-looking girls. I mean, nobody else on the plane looked like us except us,” she said. “[The flight attendants] were like older ladies. We were younger. Who knows, they could have been just jealous of us because we were younger.”
Southwest defends the incident, saying the women caused a disruption on the flight.
When the plane landed in Los Angeles, the women were escorted off by four uniformed police officers and later questioned by the FBI.
Nearly two hours later, the women were released. No charges were filed.
Still, Williams and Swedberg say they were banned from all future Southwest Airlines flights, including their scheduled flight home to Tampa.
Swedberg spent $419.50 on a one-way return ticket and arrived at TIA on Monday. Williams is still in Los Angeles trying to find a cheaper flight home. She hopes to be back to Tampa by Saturday.
Link to video of the story (where you’ll realize that the brunette isn’t as pretty as Myspace makes her): http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/us/2008/02/25/porter.too.pretty.to.fly.wtsp
Now, granted this is the same airline that kicked a woman off the plane for saying she was dressed like a skank (when she wasn’t)… but I don’t believe these two women for a second. What I do believe is that the women went all Paris Hilton on the people in question, demanding special treatment because they’re "hot" and not having any patience for being treated like everyone else. They’re clueless and didn’t get their way, and had tantrums because of it.
Well guess what, you got your asses thrown off the plane. Suck on that.
No More Weiner Poopie or the Jesus Gets It
I just don’t know how the reporter managed to read the long, rambling, one sentence "ransom" note. I can’t imagine he got through it on the first take.
I want a T-shirt made with the entire contents of the ransom note written on it.
Idiocracy was a True Story
Seriously, what was this fool attempting to do? Fold up in mid-air like a Transformer and then fit in that box?
Mexican Boy Glues Self to Bed to Avoid School
A 10-year-old Mexican boy glued his hand to his bed to avoid going back to school after the Christmas break, authorities said Monday.
"I thought if I was glued to the bed, they couldn’t make me go to school," the boy, Diego, told AFP. "I didn’t want to go, the holidays were so much fun."
"I remembered my mom had bought a very strong glue," he said of the industrial strength shoe glue he used to stick his hand to the bed’s metal headboard, where he stayed stuck for two hours.
His mother Sandra Palacios was unable to free him and called paramedics and police to help. Diego watched cartoons while they worked to unglue him, eventually using a spray to dissolve the chemical adhesive.
"I don’t know why this happened. He is a very good boy," said his mother.
Diego eventually made it school a few hours late.
Sounds like such a "smart" kid. Seems like he needs all the schooling he can get.
Or if I was a racist like my stepdaughter’s dad I’d just say: Too bad we can’t use the same glue to keep them all in their own country. Zing!
She REALLY Likes Turtles
I’m not sure what VH1 show this is from, but wow…
Pot, Kettle & Fat Drunk Lady Have an All Black Threeway
I overheard the following while Christmas shopping this holiday season, as we were waiting in line for the valet to bring us our car:
“Look, a limo. Now who the hell takes a limo to the mall?”
My brain exploded at the irony of someone calling those people lazy while waiting for a valet to return with their big, stupid automobile.
Later, the same person let loose with this string of nonsense:
“I want to go over to the Body Shop but we can’t go over to the Body Shop right now because the po-po is at the Body Shop.”